CONFESSORS…I hope you are all well and geared up for another confession. Today’s
story comes to us from sunny Barbados and a lady calling herself JJ had this to
I was so
embarrassed about what happened at Christmas that I wanted to leave Barbados as
soon as I could. My husband and I live in New York and we spent Christmas with
my husband’s parents. I get along very well with my father-in-law but not so
much with my mother-in-law as she always felt her precious son could have done better
than marrying me. She had some bougie girl lined up for him to marry but he was
not interested in her, and his mother did not waste any time telling everyone I
was not good enough for her son.
But we have
been happily married for 5 years and his mother has begun to accept the fact
that he loves me and there is nothing she can do about it. Anyhow we had a
lovely Christmas and on old year’s night my husband took me out to dinner and
we had a great time.
We did not
get back to the house until around 3am and of course we had been drinking and
were feeling horny when we got home. One thing led to another and before long
we were having some very passionate sex. Unfortunately for us due to the fact
that we had in some drinks we forgot to put a cover on our bed and by the time
we had finished making love the mattress was soaked.
you ask no, I did not wet the bed; but I am a squirter so usually we put a
plastic-back sheet over the mattress before we have sex. When we woke up later
on my father-in-law- had a great lunch prepared for us and we gratefully ate
our bellies full. But while we were eating my mother-in-law decided to tidy up
the bed in our room and found her mattress soaked.
would never think ill of her precious boy she assumed that I wet the bed and
proceeded to give me a lecture about how I can get help from my doctor for
bladder weakness and how I should consider wearing adult pampers at night if I
cannot get to the bathroom.
I was about
to tell her she was completely wrong but how could I explain female ejaculation
to a 79 year old woman? She would never of believed me and plus there was no
way I could have that conversation in front of my father-in-law. So I said
nothing and had to spend the next week with her gloating over the fact that she
now had something she could pelt in my face to make me shame. And she did so
for the rest of the time we were there.
We had to go
out and buy a new mattress for the bed and my mother-in-law told everyone in
the store she was getting a new mattress because I have a bladder problem and
wet the bed. In the end I could not take all the sniggering and finger pointing
in the store so I walked out and waited for them in the car.
I told my
husband I am never going back to her house to stay but in all honesty I doubt I
will be able to keep putting off going back there at some point, especially as
I have such a great relationship with my father-in-law.
I’m sorry I
know I should not laugh but hahahahahahaaaa, that’s too funny.
JJ, kudos on being a squirter, no wonder your husband chose you over the bougie
though….I know what it’s like to have someone you do not particularly like
having something on you to throw in your face whenever they feel like it. And
telling the people in the store you wet the bed was just plain mean.
I think you
would be wise to stay away from her house for a while and let’s hope she will
forget about it in time (but somehow I doubt it). Your other option of course is to explain it
to her, and perhaps show her online what female ejaculation really is. But I
understand your reluctance in having that kind of conversation with someone of
her generation. The only other choice you have is to let her go on thinking you
wet the bed.
It’s not a
good choice but it’s just a really unfortunate situation that cannot be easily
CONFESSORS! I hope that all is well with you this Saturday afternoon. As always
I have a juicy story for you today and not surprisingly the confessor has asked
me not to reveal their gender or what country they have written me from. So I
have taken it upon myself to call this person ‘X’. And this is what X had to
I wanted to
ask you think about a situation I am in. A couple of years ago I moved from one
city to another after getting a better job. I was not happy in my old job as my
boss was an asshole and I had far more qualifications and experience that he
did. So I applied for a new job and I am very happy where I am.
Last year I discovered
quite by accident that my former boss had a huge collection of photos of naked
children. At first I was disgusted but then I decided to get even. My former
boss had treated me like dirt for years and he owed me big time. I took a week’s
leave from my job and travelled back to where I used to live. I got in contact
with my old boss and suggested we go for a couple of drinks. As he is cheap and
greedy (among other things) I knew he would not turn down a free drink.
I picked a
quiet bar in a far out location and I told my old boss that I knew about his
dirty little secret, he was horrified to say the least. I told him I wanted a
brand new unlocked IPhone 5 and a Tag Hauser watch. He agreed without hesitation and we arranged
to meet three days later. When we met again he gave me what I asked for and we
went our separate ways.
Since then I have
decided that I could use some extra cash so I am planning to go back to my old
boss and tell him I want some money. What I wanted to ask you Carol is if you
think I should ask for a certain amount each month or take one big lump sum?
Once again I sit
here in front of my laptop with my mouth hanging open as though I am trying to
catch flies….Once again I am utterly and completely dumbfounded by the sheer
enormity of some peoples stupidity.
X… WHAT THE *%*$^*+ !!!
You mean to
tell me that by the grace of God you were put in a certain place at a certain
time in order to expose a paedophile. You had the opportunity to rid the world
of one of the worst types of predators. You were face to face with a man who
was using children to fuel his sick perverted pleasure, and the only thing you
could think of to do was blackmail him for a cell phone and a f**king watch???
X, you should
be run over with a stream roller, you should be tarred and feathered, you
should be the first person in a few centuries to be subjected to the “ducking
me try to calm myself….woooooo saahhhhhh!!!
Those of you
who read this blog regularly know that I try my best to be diplomatic and try
to see both sides of every scenario. However from time to time confessions come
my way that simply do not have two sides and for me this is one such case. X,
your behaviour is reprehensible. Do you have children? Are there any children
in your family? Do you not understand that you are allowing a menace to society
to continue menacing society?
blackmailing your old boss you are condoning his actions. By not reporting him
you are telling him that it’s OK for him to continue to do what he is doing. DO
YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? And then you have
the gall to write to me and ask me how much money you should blackmail him for.
YOU should be reporting him to the authorities, that’s what you should be
doing. And in case you have not realized it yet, if he is caught and he decides
to implicate you. You could end up as an accessory to his crimes. The two of
you could end up sharing a prison cell. How would you like that? Is it worth
the cost of a cell phone and a designer watch?
and every child a favour and report him immediately, you can even do it anonymously;
no one has to know it was you who reported him. But do not continue to sin your
soul by blackmailing this man because doing so just leaves him free to wonder
the streets and molest more and more children. Please report this man TODAY!
Year CONFESSORS! I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for
continuing to support www.blackwomenconfess.com,
without you this blog would be very dull indeed. And I would also like to wish
you all Many Blessings for this New Year. Today’s confession comes to us from a
lady calling herself Irene and she wrote this…
I have a
problem with my boyfriend and I don’t know if I should talk to him about it. We
have been dating for almost a year and I think he is someone that I could
really fall in love with. But he has an issue and I don’t know what to do about
sleeps over at my house I have to change the bed sheets as soon as he leaves. I
first noticed the “bits” in my bed a few weeks after we first became intimate.
At first I thought perhaps he had picked up some dirt from walking around bare
footed and thought nothing of it. But a few weeks later I decided to take a
closer look at the “bits” and I realised that is was not dirt.
It seems that
my boyfriend does not always get into all of the places he should when he is
showering and after sex there is often bits of faeces left in the bed. I do not
know if I should talk to him about this because it is obviously very embarrassing
but sometimes he stays at my house five or six times a week and whenever he
leaves I have to change the sheets on my bed.
I do not want
to lose him by acting like the ‘nagging wife’, please give me some advice
because I cannot go on like this.
Let me get
this straight.…Your boyfriend is so lacking in personal hygiene skills that he leaves
balls of shit in your bed?
And YOU want
to know IF you should talk to him about it!! WOW!! If I wasn't so articulate I would
be speechless right now. Irene your boyfriend is a NASTY SON OF A BITCH…who
clearly has no respect for himself or for you. This is soooooo wrong I cannot
even proclaim it enough.
OK, let me
try to be a little more diplomatic and helpful. You asked me a question (even
though it’s possible the dumbest one I've ever been asked) but I will answer
it. YES Irene you need to talk to your boyfriend about it. There is absolutely
no excuse for leaving balls of shit in someone bed. To be honest my mind
boggles at how you can even have sex with the man knowing he has so much caked
on shit welded to his butt that pieces of it drop off in your bed.
Can you not
smell it when you are in bed with him? Does it not turn your stomach? Because
it sure is turning mine and I have never even been anywhere near your
your boyfriend to come over to your home and quietly and gently tell him he
needs to make sure he washes himself thoroughly before getting into your bed
because he is forcing you to wash your bed clothes every damn day because he is
leaving “bits” behind. Be sure to let him know what you mean by bits, we do not
want him going away thinking his feet were dirty.
You need to
be absolutely clear about what you mean so there is no misunderstanding. Now…I
want you to bare a couple of things in mind. If he protests about said “bits”
then you need to tell him to keep his dirty ass at home. Basic hygiene is a
given with every human being and if he has so little regard for himself that he
is not willing to wash properly then you need to move on and find yourself a
man who respects himself and respects you.
requires evidence take him into the shower and ask him to wash his butt. I
should think all will be revealed if he were to reach behind there and take
note of what he finds. Your boyfriend should be apologetic and upset that he
put you in this situation, any other reaction, any attempt to lay blame or deny
the problem will let you know that he cares nothing about you or your feelings.
You should also know that if he reacts badly then you need to kick him to the
curb because….YOU DESERVE
Greetings CONFESSORS! I trust you all had a fantastic Christmas and you’re now
gearing up to the New Year celebrations. Today’s confession comes to us from
Guyana and a lady calling herself Anita wrote this…
I am in such
a state of depression! I cannot concentrate on anything and I am crying all of
the time. Earlier this year I found out I was pregnant and a month later the
father of the baby was sent to prison. I did not want to be pregnant as my aunt
in Canada was planning to send for me. But as she is a real Christian I knew
that if I told her I was pregnant she would not allow me into her home. I was
worried and confused, my life in Guyana is not good, things are touch here and
work is hard to come by. I knew going to Canada was the only way I could make a
good life for myself so when I discovered I was pregnant I was devastated.
I spent the
next few months trying to decide what to do. I went to have a prenatal
screening to find out the sex of the baby, but I discovered to my horror that
my baby had Down’s Syndrome. I cannot tell you how upset I was. I went to the
prison to visit the baby’s father to tell him what I had found out. He told me
to get rid of it as it would be of no use in the world. I was really hurt by
his words. Although my getting pregnant could not have come at a worse time I had
not even considered termination.
A few more
days passed and my aunt called me to let me know everything was almost in place
and she would soon be sending my plane ticket to Canada. It was then that I made
up my mind to have an abortion. I knew that the baby’s father would not have
anything to do with raising a Down Syndrome baby and I would have to do everything
myself. I also knew that I could not afford to give a child with special needs
the kind of financial care it would need.
So against my
beliefs and better judgement I terminated the pregnancy! I felt truly horrible after
the surgery. I immediately regretted what I had done but it was over and I had
to get on with my life. I left Guyana a few months ago and although I am living
a much better standard of life in Canada I cannot forget that I killed my baby.
I find myself crying all the time and I cannot even tell anyone why. My aunt
knows something bad happened back home but she has not pushed me to tell her
what it is, she just keeps saying she is there for me and I can tell her
anything but I know how important her religion is to her, she simply would not
be able to forgive me for having an abortion.
I really needed
to talk to someone and I came across your website through a cousin of mine. So I
decided to write to you. Please if you could give me some advice on how I can
get over the pain and despair I am feeling I would be eternally grateful.
Thanks for listening.
I admire your
bravery in admitting you made a mistake Anita, I am afraid many people will condemn
you for terminating your pregnancy. But I find that pointing the finger,
blaming and judging are not helpful or productive. The fact is you know you
made a mistake and you cannot take it back or change it. And you certainly do
not want to spend the rest of your life torturing yourself over it.
You have said
that your aunt is a devout Christian so talking to her about what you have been
through is out of the question, so I would suggest that you seek professional
guidance. Counsellors are not judgmental they are simply there to help you work
out your emotions and bring some closure to your situation.
One thing I know
for sure is that if you keep all of your feelings bottled up inside you something
bad will happen when you can no longer contain them. It will just get worse and
worse until you seek help. You are fortunate that you have a relative who was
generous enough to help you get a good start in life so do not waste this
opportunity by living in the past.
Go see a counsellor
as soon as you can so that you can leave your past behind you and make a better
future for yourself. God Bless.
DO YOU THINK FOLKS?
Risk all and
throw herself at the mercy of her aunt?
Keep it all
to herself and hope it gets better? OR
Talk out her
feelings with a professional?
LET US KNOW
IN THE COMMENTS BELOW!!
All the Best to
you for the New Year and thank you for being a Fan of Black Women Confess.
CONFESSORS! I hope you’re all getting into the Christmas spirit (literally). Today’s
confession comes to us from Guyana and a very distraught lady calling herself
Juanita told us this…
I wanted to
write to you because I admire the advice you give to confessions. Plus I may
not be around all that long and I thought it would be kind of nice to have my
confession posted even though my story is not a happy one and will not have a
I’ll get straight
to the point Carol, I’m dying! I have cancer and the doctors have given me
about 7 months. With a great deal of determination and medication I am able to
function at home but some days are better than others. It has taken a while for
me to come to grips with the fact that I will not live to see another birthday
or Christmas but I have made peace with my God.
The one thing that is giving me more pain than the cancer ever could is
the fact that my husband had told me he wants a divorce.
At first I assumed
he had another woman, but he says it is because he cannot stay around and watch
me die. Ever since the doctors told me there was nothing more they could do for
me my husband fell apart, he became depressed and even lost his job because he
could not focus on his work. He is a very sensitive man and is not the sort of
person who handles trauma well, but I would never have believed that he would
go so far as to want to divorce me at a time like this.
I begged him
to reconsider but he says his mind is made up and he is going to move to
England with his brother. I am so afraid; I do not want to die alone. I have
very little family in Guyana, my sister and two brothers live in Jamaica. But
they cannot afford to come back and live with me as they have jobs and
families. My parents both died when I was quite young so my husband has been
everything to me for many years.
I wish there
was something I could say to him to make him understand that what I am going
through is much worse than what he is going through, he seems to think that his
suffering is greater than mine, but some days the pain I feel is so terrible I wonder
if I will even last the time the doctors say that I have.
used to read your confessions to me when I first became ill and was too weak to
get up so I know he likes your stories, I am hoping that you could say
something to him to make him reconsider leaving me. I will not be a burden to
him much longer so why can’t he just stay? I would appreciate anything you
could tell him that may help. Thank you Carol and God bless you.
aches for you Juanita, I am so sorry that you are suffering the way you are. To be honest with you when I first began to read you story I was building up to
giving your husband a real ear bashing but as you have asked me to address him
directly on your behalf I will attempt to keep my anger and disgust at his
filing for divorce under control.
Sir, I am in
the position to be able to say I know exactly how you feel. I myself have lost
two people that I loved with all my heart to cancer. I watched them go from
strong vibrant people to frail and helpless people and it was extremely
difficult to do. So I am not going to sit here and tell you it’s easy and you
can handle it because quite frankly I have no idea what you can handle from
what you cannot.
I will ask you to do is think of your wife. Put yourself in her position. Would
YOU want to die alone? How would you feel if in your darkest hour the person
you loved the most ran away and left YOU? Now is not the time for self-indulgent
behavior, now is the time to show the love and commitment you made to your
wife when you said…For Better For Worse, In Sickness and In Health!
needs you more than anyone else has ever needed you. You cannot be suffering
more than she is because she is the one that is going to die, NOT YOU! Your
behaviour has been disgraceful at best, but you can make amends. I beg you to
stay with your wife and make her final months as comfortable and peaceful as
you can. Because trust me when she has gone you do not want to live with the
guilt of abandoning her.
One of things
that will help you during your grieving will be the knowledge that you did everything
you could possibly have done for her while she was alive. It will ease the pain
of her death to know that you were the one who was there by her side to the
very end. You have time to recover from the depression you are going through,
YOUR WIFE DOES NOT!
her, show her your love. Comfort her and take care of her until she draws her
final breath. And most of all be thankful for the time you had with her! God
Bless you Both.
To YOU Folks…
YOU Say To Juanita’s Husband To Make Him Reconsider Divorce???
CONFESSORS, here we are again on a bright and breezy sunny Saturday afternoon.
And if like me you are at home chilling, I have the perfect confession for you.
Today’s story comes the way from New York and a lady calling herself Keisha K
I am now at
the lowest I have ever been in my life. I cannot believe that the man I gave
the best years of my life too has served me with divorce papers. When my
husband and I got married I was 20 and he was 39. None of my family wanted me
to marry him as they said he was too old for me. But I was so in love with him
and I truly felt we could have a good life and a good marriage.
I was not
prepared for what real married life was all about and I soon became unhappy.
Before we were married my husband used to wine and dine me. We used to take
great vacations and have loads of fun. As soon as we got married he said we had
to be more conservative and respectable now that we are married and all of the
However I soon
became pregnant and all of my attention turned to the twin girls I was going to
give birth too.
later I met a charming attractive man and after some months of talking to one
another we began an affair. It turned out that the man I had met ran an escort
agency and he told me that an attractive woman like me could make a lot of
money escorting lonely older gentlemen to dinner, the theatre and business
trips etc. At first I dismissed the idea but as a housewife who relied solely
on her husband financially I began to see the merit in making my own money.
a year my lover asked me if I would like to earn even more money. I asked him
how and he said by having sex with my clients. He said a number of my regulars
had be asking to spend a night with me and were willing to pay a great deal of
money. I thought about it for a very long time. I knew that it was nothing
short of prostitution. But I also knew that if I wanted to get away from my husband
and still provide for my daughters I would need a bigger sum of money than I already
had so I agreed.
I was sick to
my stomach every time I had sex with a client, it was not something I enjoyed
but I did my best to keep my mind on the money. I kept reminding myself I was
doing this for myself and my daughters. I continued doing escort work for the
next 5 years until one day I came home from the market to find my husband at
the door with a couple of suitcases. He told me I had to leave and shut the
door in my face. When I tried to open the door my key would not fit the lock.
I went to my lover’s
house and he told me I could stay with him. I tried to see my daughters but my
husband would not let me get anywhere near them even though they were crying
and begging him to let them see their momma. A couple of weeks later I was
served with divorce papers. At that point I could not have been happier, until I
read what my husband was trying to do.
had an investigator follow me around from the moment we got married and he knew
when I started my affair and he knew when I started working as an escort. He
wanted full custody of our daughters and he wanted half of the money I had made
and he wanted the house. I could live with him taking the house because I had
enough money to buy another one easily, but there was no way in hell I was
going to let him take full custody of our daughters and take my money too.
I went to see
my own lawyer and I was told that basically there was no way I was going to get
custody of my children if my husband had proof I was having sex with the men I escorted.
I did not know whether my husband had proof but I could not take the risk. The
lawyer suggested I go to court and plead with the judge to allow me access to
my children in return for no longer working as an escort and getting a regular
I did this
and I was granted visitation rights. The divorce has yet to be agreed upon but
my lawyer thinks I have a good chance of keeping my money. I cannot believe
that my husband would be so vindictive as to want to take the money I earned. Before
I began working as an escort I could have easily divorced him and legally taken
half of his money. But I did not want his money I wanted to be able to be
totally independent and free of him and what did I get for my kindness? I got
my children taken away from me and I may end up penniless.
I truly hope
my husband rots in hell; I cannot even stand to look at him and it drives me
crazy that a man like him is going to be responsible for raising my daughters.
I would like to recommend to any women who are thinking about getting married
that they have a pre-nup so any time they want out they can get what the agreed
upon and step out without having to look back at his sorry ass.
Erm Keisha I’m
having a little trouble understanding you. Do you actually believe that you are
the innocent party here? Do you honestly think that you are being wronged by
Let me recap
this a minute, you’re a married woman yet you have a lover. Your lover cares so
much about you that he asked you if you want to have sex with men for money. You
have a shit load of money you made from having sex with random men and you want
somebody to put two young impressionable girls in your hands for you to serve
as a role model to them? What exactly could YOU teach them? HOOKING 1-0-1
This is not a
remake of Pretty Woman you cannot do what you have done for money and then
expect a judge to allow you to raise your daughters alone. You have already
proved that you would do anything for money so what judge in their right mind
is going to give you sole custody of two girls. What if you fell on hard times,
what would you do? Go back to hooking again? Leave your daughters in one room
while you “entertain” in another room?
You need to
wake up and face the reality of YOUR actions!
And as for
your husband I am sure you are aware that he is not trying to take your money because
he wants your money, he is trying to take it to hurt you as much as you have
hurt him. But to be honest I think the two of you deserve each other. Because
quite frankly I do not know what sort of man decides to have is wife followed
by an investigator from the moment he gets married. I also do not know what
sort of man is willing to say nothing for >>>>FIVE
YEARS<<<< while his wife is constantly lying to him and sleeping
with strange men >>>>FOR MONEY<<<<.
All I can say
is if this is what the modern marriage looks like I feel for the coming
So What Do
Be Allowed to
Keep Her Money and Raise Her Daughters?
Be Tossed Off
A High Building to See If She Can Fly? OR
Confessors! I know some of you have been waiting with baited breath for
Saturday to come around to get your latest confession fix and I think I can safely
say that this week’s story shall not disappoint you. I cannot state which
country this week’s confession comes from because the lady in question
specifically asked me not to reveal this.
So I suggest
you get yourselves comfy and read our latest confession. And remember to let us
know what YOU think in the comments below….ENJOY!!
Carol. I would like to tell you about the situation I was in up until recently.
I was raised
by wealthy parents, I had a good upbringing and my brothers and I wanted for
nothing. I always presumed that when I grew up I would meet a wonderful man,
fall in love and get married. But it seems the Gods had a different path for me
to follow. When I was 18 my father told me that one of the most powerful men in
my town wanted me to marry his son. I was familiar with the family and knew the
son but did not have any ideas about marrying him.
I told my
father I was not ready to marry, he already knew that I wanted to travel to the
US to study, and although he had previously agreed to this something had
changed. I later learned from one of my mother’s sisters that the father of the
man whom I was to marry paid my father a great deal of money in order for me to
marry his son. Apparently his son had seen me around and decided that he wanted
me for his bride.
made it clear to me that he was not asking me if I wanted to marry this man, he
was telling me that I was going to marry him. I had no choice; I was to become
this man’s wife. I was so very upset and
cried for weeks. My mother did her best to comfort me and even told me that her
marriage to my father was arranged and she did not want to marry him either but
over the years she grew to love him and they had a good marriage.
This made me
feel a little better but I still did not want to marry a man that I did not
choose for myself. Eventually our wedding day arrived and for me it was the
saddest day of my life. I had cried the entire night before and my mother and
cousins and friends did their best to disguise my puffy eyes. But nothing could
hide the sadness in my heart. When I cried during the ceremony everyone present
assumed it was because I was overcome with joy, they could not have been more
I must admit
to you Miss Carol that my husband did everything in his power to make me happy
and comfortable. He gave me complete control over the building and decorating
of our home and he was always courteous, polite and gentle with me. Although we
consummated our marriage he knew I was not attracted to him in that way and
rarely approached me for intercourse after our wedding night and for this I was
All of my
friends and younger family members envied my home, my husband and my marriage
and simply could not understand why I was so unhappy. No one except my mother
understood how I felt and she was a great source of comfort to me. She taught me
how to get along and make the most of my lot in life. For the first two years I would not say I was
happy but I had learned to be contented.
everything I could want in life and I had the freedom to come and go as I saw
fit. But all I really wanted in life was to have a man I could truly love. At
the start of the third year of our marriage my husband returned from a business
trip with a woman. He announced simply and coldly that she was going to be his
second wife. I was so shocked I could not even manage to speak. Never once had
it occurred to me that he would ever take another wife.
took place a few weeks later and the woman moved into my home. Once again I did
my best to make peace with the life the Gods had chosen for me. I did all that
I could to make my husband’s second wife comfortable, but she was never even
civil towards me. It was obvious my husband preferred this woman to me and a
part of me was jealous. He took her on long trips; they ate out at exclusive
hotels and made love where ever they wanted to in the house.
I became like
a servant in my own home. The woman would order me around, make me fetch and
carry for her and when I refused she would go to my husband who would always
insist I do whatever she wanted. It was the most miserable time of my life and
I thought it could not possibly get worse until my husband took a third wife.
By that time
I had learned how to be the invisible woman in my home. Hardly anyone noticed
whether I was there or not. My husband’s new wife was very young, she was even
younger than I was when he married me and clearly she did not want to be
married to him either. At last I had an ally. We got to know each other quickly
and soon were very close. I did my best to help her settle in and tried to
teacher her how to live the life I was living and still find some measure of
happiness, and she was very grateful for my help.
My husband soon stopped
having intercourse with his second wife as he had done with me. But unlike me,
she was not happy about it. Soon the arguments began. The second wife would
storm into my husband’s bedroom when he was with his third wife and demand she
leave and he make love to her.
never a moment’s peace in my home. My husband and his two other wives argued
and fought constantly. I tried to stay out of their way but often the second
wife would do her best to pick fights with me. I was totally miserable.
One night I
went to my husband and begged him to let me go. There was no love between us;
there was no affection or even intercourse between us, so why keep me bound to
him. But he simply laughed at me and said I would be his wife till the day I
Just over a
year later I had spent the day with my mother, when I returned home I entered
to find my husband and his second wife fighting. I quietly entered and dashed
up to my room not wanting to get dragged into their latest argument. A few
minutes later the third wife rushed into my bedroom screaming and crying
hysterically. I tried to get her to calm down and tell me what was wrong but
she just grabbed me by my hand and dragged me out of my room and down the
stairs. We entered the kitchen and what I saw will probably haunt me for the
rest of my life.
was lying in a pool of blood on the floor and his second wife was sitting on
the floor in the opposite corner with the knife and her hands covered in blood.
I froze for a moment trying to comprehend what I was seeing. But then my senses
returned to me and I rushed to my husband to check his pulse, he was still
breathing so I grabbed the telephone and called for help.
was rushed to hospital but he died within a few minutes of arrival, we were
told he had lost too much blood and there was nothing they could have done.
wife was charged with murder but committed suicide with a few months of being
arrested. As for me and my husband’s third wife, we have remained close. Many
women shun us and laugh at us because it is believed that if all three of us
were pleasing to our husband the fight and subsequent stabbing would not have
occurred. My father says I failed my husband and was a bad wife.
I am going
away to Canada soon. I have relations there and I am looking forward to
starting over. I encouraged wife number three to come with me and she is
thinking about it. I do hope she comes because it will be nice to know someone
there who knows what I have gone through and is sympathetic to what we have
I know many
of your readers will say it serves us right for being married to such a man. I
know it is hard for western women to understand that there are women in the
world who are powerless to men. I hope and pray for a better life in Canada but
most of all I pray for the young women in my country who are forced into such
marriages. I pray they do not suffer as I have.
As a western
woman I cannot even begin to conceive of the idea of being in your situation at
the tender age of 18. You have shown that you have great courage and strength
to endure all that you have. We in the west think that we have great strength
but in truth we are spoiled. How many of us can honestly say we have the
fortitude to go through what you did and survive with grace?
We have no idea
what it is to not be able to make our own choices and decisions. We have no
idea what it is to have to obey our parents to the detriment of our happiness,
and when we marry we certainly do not have to worry about whether our husbands
with move two other women into our home. I cannot even get my head around that
to be honest.
had to suffer the loss of your husband under traumatic circumstances and then
had to face the chastisement from those around you, I am still so very happy
that you and your friend have the opportunity to start your lives over in a
country where you can make choices and decisions for yourselves. I pray that
you will allow yourselves some time to relax, have fun and learn to be joyous
again, and start to live the life that was stolen from you at such a young age.
Thank you so
much for sending your story to us Zee, it is my hope that women will be humbled
and feel more gratitude for the freedom of choice they take for granted. It is
also my hope that someday the women of your country can gather enough strength
and unity in numbers to make changes to your society so you too have live life
how YOU choose to.
SO WHAT DO
YOU THINK? LET US KNOW IN THE COMMENTS BELOW!
Afternoon Confessors! Happy Independence to all of you residing in the
beautiful Caribbean island of Barbados!
Today’s confession comes to us from the land of wood and water, better
known as Jamaica. A lady calling herself
Jane Doe wrote this…
I wanted to
send you this confession because something I have done is weighing heavily on
my mind. I am a single mother and I have two kids. My husband passed away,
three years ago and I have been struggling financially ever since. I work as a
customer service representative at a pharmaceutical company.
husband died we were a stable family with a nice big home in a good area. Since
my husband’s passing I found out he had a few loans paying but no life
insurance so now with just the one salary coming in life has become very
difficult for me and my children.
A few months
ago I summoned the courage to ask my boss for a pay rise. To my surprise my
boss told me that he had always found me attractive and if I have sex with him
he would increase my salary by $300 dollars per month. At first I was disgusted
by his proposition but as the bills kept coming and the bank threatened to take
my house I decided to agree to have sex with my boss.
He took me to
a very exclusive hotel and we had a nice dinner. Afterwards he took me up to a
suit. He began undressing me and kissing me. I have to be honest and say I was
quite turned on by him. We moved to the bed where he continued to kiss and
caress me. As I became more aroused he entered me very roughly and when I began
to object he put his hand over my mouth and told me to shut up. He grabbed me
and turned me onto my front and said he was going to f***k me in the ass. I
said hell no and tried to get up.
He pushed me
back down and told me I better take it if I expect to get any money from him. Once
again I tried to get up but he put his full weight on me and I could not move.
He did what he threatened to do and it was extremely painful. When it was over
he said he was going to shower and I had better not be there by the time he
I got up and
tried to walk but I was in so much pain. I managed to struggle outside and get
a taxi. I went straight into the shower when I got home I felt so dirty. When I
got in the shower I realised I was bleeding. I went to the hospital and had to
have a couple of stitches. The nurses assumed I had been raped and kept
encouraging me to report the matter. I told them I would and left as soon as I could.
I sent a sick
note into work and did not go back for two weeks. When I returned to work my
boss called me into his office and asked me when I would be ready for round 2.
I was so angry and disgusted. I asked him where my money was and he told me the
extra money would be added to my salary at the end of the month.
Since then I have
had sex with my boss 3 more times and he has almost doubled my salary. I hate
what I have done but I keep reminding myself it is so that I can keep a roof
over my children’s heads. I am trying to find another job and I pray every day
that I will find something soon. I really what to tell my boss to keep his damn
job but right now I cannot do that. I am paying my husband’s loans and by early
next year I will have paid them off completely; I cannot wait for that day so I
no longer have to suffer the humiliation of having to have this horrible sex
with my boss. Please say a prayer for me.
WTF are you
really doing? Is selling your body really the only option you had? I think NOT!
You could have sold your big house and moved into something smaller that you
could manage on your single salary. Did you really stop and think about your
options? And what about your children? DO you have girls, is this the kind of behaviour
you want your children to adopt? I know you think they are not involved and
they will never know but these nasty skeletons have a bad habit of jumping out
of the closet at exactly the wrong time.
I do feel
sorry for you because I think you have made a huge mistake that you have little
chance of correcting. All I would suggest is that you go all out (not sexually
though) to get a new job, and I hope that your actions do not come back to bite
you in the ass later on in life.
Confessors! Those of you who have been following my blog for a while will know
that although the majority of our Confessions are sent in by black women we do
accept Confessions from both men and women of all races. With that in mind
today's Confession comes to us from a gentleman from Atlanta Georgia who wrote
I would like
to tell you about a situation that occurred between me and a very good friend
of mine. I am a white guy and one of my best friends is black. We grew up in
the same neighborhood, went to the same schools and have been friends for
almost 20 years. I have never considered myself to be racist as I associate
with people of many different ethnic backgrounds so I was very upset when my friend
got mad at me and accused me of being racist over what I thought was a harmless
I often go
out drinking with my friend and his two brothers as I know them all well. My
friend is probably one of the coolest people I know and I always wished I could
be a confident and smooth as he is. A few weeks ago we made arrangements to
meet at a bar. I got their pretty early and had a few drinks. My friend and his
brothers got their much later by which time I’d had quite a bit to drink.
arrived they came up to the bar and as usual greeted me by saying “what’s up
dog” I responded by saying “what’s up nigger” and all hell broke loose. My friend
and his brothers went crazy, they started yelling at me and calling me racist.
I told them that I did not mean anything by it I was just greeting them as they
greet each other but they accused me of calling them niggers and began accusing
me of being a closet racist and saying that I probably go to KKK meetings.
confused and hurt by what they said, I kept apologizing and they told me to go
and never speak to them again. That was about two weeks ago. Since then I have
been to see my friend a couple of times but he just balled me out and told me
to get the fuck off his door step and don’t come back. I got mad and told him
he was being an asshole and he pushed me off his step and slammed the door.
I really don’t
know what I did to deserve being treated that way. We have been friends for
years and we have never so much as had a disagreement before now. I just want
the opportunity to tell my friend that I am not racist I was not raised that
way and I was just using a figure of speech that he himself always uses. Why is
it OK for black guys to use that word but it’s not OK for white guys?
afraid you walked into a tricky situation that will probably be disputed until
the end of time. I understand your confusion because quite frankly I myself as
a black person cannot understand why black people have that word in their vocabulary
at all. It is a word that I never ever use. And I do not like anyone black or
white to use that word to address or describe me.
That said you
showed a lack of judgment by thinking that calling a black guy nigger, no
matter how you meant it, would be acceptable. But of be fair we black people
are the cause of that. I know many black people that call themselves and other
black people nigger but get offended when a white person uses the word and in
my humble opinion if it’s OK for one person to say it should be OK for all. If
you are offended by white people using that word WHY in God’s name are you
using it yourself?
Andy this is not a situation that you can change. It is something we black
people do and only those that perpetuate this behavior can tell you why they
do it. I myself have no idea!
It is a pity
that you had to lose a good friend over something so petty and I hope that in
time your friend will calm down and listen to reason. And if not, then you must
accept the fact that this person was not really your friend because true
friends listen to one another and forgive one another.
Take care and
thanks for sending in your story!
What Do YOU
Think Folks?? Is Andy…
A racist mutherfucker
who attends KKK meetings?
Is he just
ignorant and made a simple mistake?
Or is he just
another nerdy white guy trying to act black?
confessors! Here we are again with another confession from some poor troubled
soul. Our confession comes today from sunny Barbados and a very Confused lady
had this to say….
I have a
problem that I would like your help with. I have been with my partner for
almost 7 years we have a nice relationship and we are thinking about having
children. My partner wants us to go to the States to get married and although I
do want to get married I am concerned about some very odd feelings I am having.
brother has been staying with us for a few months while his house is being
redecorated and I have found myself being drawn to him. I have known him for a
long time and I have never had any strong feelings towards him until now. In
fact this is the first time in my life I can remember being attracted to a man.
I have known I was a lesbian from a very young age; I was never attracted to
guys only girls so I simply paid no attention to guys that wanted to talk to
But now I am
in a situation where I think about this man all the time, when we are together
I feel like a little school girl with a crush. Why do I suddenly have such
strong feelings towards this man? I even fanaticize about having a three-some
with my girlfriend and her brother. Is there something wrong with me?
I am afraid
something is going to happen between us as we get along very well and we are
often alone in the house together because my partner does shift work. And I
feel his is attracted to me also.
I love my
partner and I want her to be happy but how can I go off to the States and be
married when I am falling for her brother. I never lied to her before and I
don’t want to start now. But I do not want to lose her and I think if I tell
her how I feel about her brother she will never forgive me. How can I get over
my feelings for this man?
You have to
find out how deep your feelings for this man run. Is this just a fleeting
attraction or do you think you are falling in love with him? In time you may also
have to consider the idea that you are bisexual. It is certainly nothing new but
it appears to be new to you but either way you must take the time to sort your
suggest you talk to your partner. You have to be honest with her. You cannot
enter into a marriage knowing you have strong feelings for someone else. Yes
she will be upset but imagine how she will feel if you end up having an affair
with this man.
soul my dear and decide who you really want. Are your feelings for this man
stronger than your feelings for you partner? If yes then you are going to have
to tell your partner. If no then you are still going to have to tell your
partner before you get married. If you do want to stay with her then you have
to trust that she will forgive you. It is best to deal with this now while it
is still an attraction rather than waiting till it becomes something far more
serious. I wish you luck.
SO! What do
YOU think? Should “Confused”……
her partner as she has here?
Keep it a
secret and go off and get married? OR
Keep it in
the family and sleep with both of them?